HOMESTEADING: ISOLATION

We got some sad news this week...some homesteaders out west that we correspond with are splitting up. They moved from the BIG city to a spread on the prairie. They thought it would be an idyllic life.

They ran cattle. That's what you call it when you raise cattle...running cattle. They had built up a modest herd. They moved out west from L.A. almost 3 years before we moved to Florida.

She says the isolation killed the marriage. I' sure there was more to it than that. But isolation is part of homesteading. And Isolation can kill.

Isolation can devastate many. Or bless others. After 28 years in the public eye, I was more than ready for some isolation even though it was certainly the last thing I ever thought I'd be doing! But Ron had always had the dream. When we first met, he said that all his life he had wanted to live in a cabin in the middle of the woods.

Well, that's what we did.

It's a long way from the road to our house.

We stay active. We do things. Ron goes into town every day to go to the post office. I go with him once a week. Unlike a big city post office, our post office is where you find out the latest news. If you see some construction going on in town, you ask at the post office and you find out what's being built. See a house go up for sale? Just ask, you'll find out why. Of course, you have to be willing to shed a little light on your own life. It's only fair to contribute to the grape vine.

We also go to the feed store. You learn a lot there, too. Same with the bank, the grocery store and, of course, the pharmacy. The only thing is, we can go to the post office, the bank, the pharmacy, the gas station, the feed store and the grocery store in a trip of about 30 minutes. According to how long we chat and how long we shop. In a town that's only a couple of blocks long, everything is right there in one spot. It makes life simple. Simple is good.

We go to the fireworks displays at Christmas and the 4th of July. Yes, for those of you NOT from the deep South, we southerners shoot fireworks at Christmas. Huge professional displays on the water. They are great. You meet neighbors and get to chat with people you don't see very often.

We call on our neighbors a couple of times per week and we go to the library every 2 weeks. Mix that in with all the doctor's visits and we have a very, very full life.

Our house is on a dirt road far from

the madding crowd.

Some people get isolated because they never became involved with the community. After moving to the "sticks" many folks become disillusioned. A lot of city people want to move to the country and "connect" with nature, but they don't realize that when you leave the big city behind, you leave big city ideas and big city "dudes" behind, too. You might not like country folk. You might call them hicks. Some people think country folks are dumb. As Gary Sinese, one of my favorite actors and a Texan, once said: "Country don't mean dumb."

The problem isn't with the denizens of rural America. My friend felt isolated. And she grew to hate her life. Now she's leaving and going back to L.A. It's where she belongs.

Homesteading takes planning. And hard work. And patience. And strength. And an ability to back up and start over again and again and sometimes again. It takes the ability to admit ignorance and an ability to learn new lessons. It takes strength and wonder and the capacity to be awestruck. If you don't have that, you can't handle it.

It helps to have a strong partnership. But it is good to be strong enough to admit that you tried and failed. That you were wrong in thinking you could make it. It's right to pack up when it's time to move back to the city. But it's sad.

We are sad that our friends' lives have come to the end of the entwined cord that was their marriage. Others will try to homestead. Some will make it. Some will barely make it. Some will fail. Some will thrive.

Ron and I are thriving.

More later....


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